Sunday, July 13, 2008
Annoying things my sales reps do and say to me - Hank
Hank is actually not one of my sales reps - he belongs to one of my fellow Strategic Sales Executives. But this is just as annoying as anything one of mine could do.
Bill, my fellow Strategic Sales Executive, is out on vacation and has an out-of-office email message directing inquiries to our boss.
The other day my boss received one such inquiry, from Hank. This is what it said:
"Bill is out on vacation so he can't attend this meeting with me next week. I need someone to come with me, someone who knows Product X very well and who can hit it out of the park. I need them to be able to discuss Product X intelligently with an accounting firm customer, and who can cover all the nuances of the product."
So essentially what he is saying is "I really need help from someone who won't get any sales credit or commission. And they better know what the fuck they are doing."
At first I drafted an email response to Hank as follows:
"Hank, I am available to help you next week, but only with a minimum level of competence. I most likely will not 'hit it out of the park' as you require, but if I'm lucky, may be able to get a base hit."
I did not send it. Instead, I simply replied to my boss, saying "it appears that Hank has very high standards and as such I will not have the time required next week to prepare the level of presentation that would be acceptable to him. Sorry!"
Can I just reiterate that I really, really hate sales people?