Tuesday, October 24, 2017

CP's Pretend Interview with (former) bloggers: Another visit with Lulu


CP recently pretended to sit down with Sri Lankan superstar Lulu again to discuss general topics.



CP: So Lulu, how is South Asia treating you these days?

Lulu: Still haven’t been swept into the Indian Ocean, so I’d say so far, so good. When are you coming for another visit? 

CP: As soon as my travel ban has been lifted, maybe.

Lulu: Are they going to let you near school grounds again any time soon? Let me know so I can warn my students.

CP: You know perfectly well those charges were dropped! And anyway Lu, that was a low blow. Inappropriate talk for my blog.

Lulu: You’re the one writing this. Blame yourself.

CP: Fine. 

Lulu: Why are you still fake-interviewing me? Don’t you have other former blog friends to annoy with this? And why do I still sound like a bitch? 

CP: Maybe your voice is the only one I’ve been able to find. I don’t know how other, normal people are supposed to sound during a conversation with me. 

Lulu: Don’t you ever talk to anyone else?

CP: On occasion. It’s just that I like to relive every conversation I’ve ever had with you. You make me laugh.

Lulu: Because I’m a bitch? God CP, you are predictable. “Any bitch with a drug habit and she’s yours.”

CP: You’re the one who aspires to Eddie Monsoon, in all ways and in all things. 

Lulu: Are you planning to ask anything remotely resembling an interview question here? 

CP: I guess not. It’s just that without Facebook I no longer know what to do online.

Lulu: Which is why you’re pestering me for music recommendations. I think I’ll make you wait, because I can.

CP: I noticed. Anyway, thanks again Lu for stopping by CPW. I’ll try to make it less dull next time.