Tuesday, December 21, 2004

I'm wearing a wife beater

My weird friend Daniel said it pisses him off when guys wear t-shirts under their dress shirts where you can see the t-shirt sleeves through the long sleeves of the dress shirt. I don't know why this "pisses him off" - it seems there are a lot worse things to be upset about. Nevertheless, I recently decided to try wearing undershirts because it's winter now and besides, the whole thing about being able to see through a dress shirt got me thinking maybe people have been sneaking peeks at my cute little masculine anatomical things. So I done got myself some wife beaters because that way I figure I won't piss Daniel off since there will be no t-shirt sleeves to see.

Problem is, whenever I wear undershirts they tend to creep up and not stay tucked into my pants. So today I got clever and tucked my wife beater right into the strap of my underpants. End result was that I felt Mormon all day - like I was wearing one of their celestial garments. Like this one:

My wife beater makes me feel fat because it adds a whole new layer that my pants and belt have to wrap around. And I'm sorry, but there just ain't that much room left to spare in that arena. But I have to admit that one of the benefits to my having gotten fat is that at least my upper torso now doesn't look so scrawny. I can actually wear a wife beater now, and as long as your eyes don't go too far south I look halfway decent. F*ck yeah!

1 comment:

Melinda June said...

I'd take undershirt sleeves showing under a dress shirt over nipples and chest hair any day of the week. It pisses me off when me DON'T wear t-shirts under their dress shirts. You must choose...Daniel or me???????