The only thing I like is the "Hello my name is Dale and I'm an alcoholic" part of the deal. Just hearing so many people say HI DALE all at once is enough to keep me warm until I can get out of there and get to my next drink.
When You realize you shaved your head except for a little rat tail hanging from the top and you're pestering people to buy incense & crap, you have a drinking problem.
I recently got pulled over by a lovely female officer in the small city of Canandaigua, on suspicion of "sick or intoxicated". When she saw me in my riding boots and breeches, it turned out that she rode too. Unfortunately, she was also aware that horse people have a reputation as heavy drinkers. A lot of people need a little artificial courage before they get on their horses, LOL! After "talking horse" for awhile, and her inspecting my eyes,which probably were bloodshot from fatigue, and asking me ten times if I wasn't sure that I hadn't had a drink or two (wouldn't I know? and unfortunately, I am incapable of lying), she let me go. It would be easier just to drink, especially since I live so close to all of the great Finger Lakes wineries, but I have a horse. She takes all of my money and a little bit more!
If you find pounding headaches and hangovers interesting, by all means, go for it! Come to Chicago and hang out with me and some of my comedian friends; alcoholism is almost the default setting for this crowd, as I'm finding out. Some of them try to frame it in a "suffering artist" sort of way, but none of them are Dylan Thomas, so that falls a bit flat.
cp--if you develop a drinking problem, you'll evenytually have to go to a 12 step program, and those people are a pain to be around. Remember my old roommate Cathy B (a comedian as well, and totally lethal) I say go for smack or something more romantic.
It's only a problem if it gets in the way of work or relationships. Otherwise it might be a "drinking habit" or a "hobby".
Life is plenty interesting watching people. The problem is that when you are sober, you look at them and think they are drunk and don't approach. If you've had a few then you think you need to make this wanna-be comedian your friend. (You could approach him without stokin down 3 martinis).
I had just been thinking about Lu's old roommate Cathy. Lu talked me into letting her stay with me in LA when she was there on an audition. I got home and she was already there; helped herself to making coffee and used toilet paper because she couldn't find the filters - and locked my cats in the bedroom because she was allergic. Charming form! (I hadn't even met her yet.)
I'm so relived; I thought I was the only person who thinks things like that. I was thinking about taking up smoking cloves, but only because I want to be cool.
26 comments:
The occasional epic bender isn't a problem if you don't do it more than 3 or 4 times a week.
Oh, definitely. You can get away with saying whatever you damn well want, and blame it on the booze.
Plus, you can pull off that swilling a martini glass look.
The only thing I like is the "Hello my name is Dale and I'm an alcoholic" part of the deal. Just hearing so many people say HI DALE all at once is enough to keep me warm until I can get out of there and get to my next drink.
i know i need some kind of vice to make mine more interesting. i just don't want to spend the money.
HI DALE
"Work is the curse of the drinking classes."
-- Oscar Wilde
When You realize you shaved your head except for a little rat tail hanging from the top and you're pestering people to buy incense & crap, you have a drinking problem.
Take me with you, CP.
You can call it a drinking solution if that makes your decision easier.
'Drinking situation' also works.
As long as you're not a mean drunk then hell yeah, go for it.
I recently got pulled over by a lovely female officer in the small city of Canandaigua, on suspicion of "sick or intoxicated". When she saw me in my riding boots and breeches, it turned out that she rode too. Unfortunately, she was also aware that horse people have a reputation as heavy drinkers. A lot of people need a little artificial courage before they get on their horses, LOL! After "talking horse" for awhile, and her inspecting my eyes,which probably were bloodshot from fatigue, and asking me ten times if I wasn't sure that I hadn't had a drink or two (wouldn't I know? and unfortunately, I am incapable of lying), she let me go.
It would be easier just to drink, especially since I live so close to all of the great Finger Lakes wineries, but I have a horse. She takes all of my money and a little bit more!
Your Cousin Cathy
well I guess you could but the down side is the calories and money spent - besides your life is interesting to me even without the booze
If you find pounding headaches and hangovers interesting, by all means, go for it! Come to Chicago and hang out with me and some of my comedian friends; alcoholism is almost the default setting for this crowd, as I'm finding out. Some of them try to frame it in a "suffering artist" sort of way, but none of them are Dylan Thomas, so that falls a bit flat.
I thought you already had...
You mean to tell me Mama Jin doesn't make your life interesting enough? Please tell me she lives up to the hype!
cp--if you develop a drinking problem, you'll evenytually have to go to a 12 step program, and those people are a pain to be around. Remember my old roommate Cathy B (a comedian as well, and totally lethal) I say go for smack or something more romantic.
It's only a problem if it gets in the way of work or relationships. Otherwise it might be a "drinking habit" or a "hobby".
Life is plenty interesting watching people. The problem is that when you are sober, you look at them and think they are drunk and don't approach. If you've had a few then you think you need to make this wanna-be comedian your friend. (You could approach him without stokin down 3 martinis).
I had just been thinking about Lu's old roommate Cathy. Lu talked me into letting her stay with me in LA when she was there on an audition. I got home and she was already there; helped herself to making coffee and used toilet paper because she couldn't find the filters - and locked my cats in the bedroom because she was allergic. Charming form! (I hadn't even met her yet.)
Anything not worth doing is not worth doing well.
I was going to comment on your post, but now I'm totally hung up on your cousin's statement that "horse people have a reputation as heavy drinkers".
Is that true? Do I need to start worrying about being run over by a drunken equestrian?
To anandamide:
Yup! Although that is mostly at horse shows. A lot of people need a little drink or two or three to steady their nerves before they compete.
Cathy
I'm so relived; I thought I was the only person who thinks things like that. I was thinking about taking up smoking cloves, but only because I want to be cool.
Provided you don't go all steppy and you're a festive lush, why the fuck not?!
I did that several times, ergo good stories.
Take it from me, having a drinking problem isn't that interesting.
Post a Comment