Thursday, November 09, 2006

Tonight on the Subway


It had been a long day, and my eyes were bothering me so much due to the glaring light inside the subway car that I had to stop reading and just sit with my eyes closed. I was relieved when the D train pulled into 36th Street so that I could transfer to a local to get to my final stop.

The wait at 36th Street for a local, at least before 8:00 pm, is usually two minutes or less. Tonight I waited over ten minutes. I could feel my mood darkening.

Into the station pulled an N train, which is another express to take me ALMOST all the way home. I boarded. This particular train was overheated and smelly, so imagine my relief when it finally pulled into the 59th Street station, where I would wait for my R train to take me one more stop to my final destination - HOME.

As I approached the car door to exit, I was suddenly blocked by an onslaught of people ENTERING the train, shoving their way in before anyone could disembark. It did not help that an ill mannered girl of about fifteen just stood in the doorway, effectively blocking anyone from passing her. Another girl that she knew had been standing on the platform, and was one of the rude people to shove herself into the car before we could exit.

"LET US OFF THE TRAIN, PLEASE," I said rather loudly. I was actually nervous that the doors were going to slam shut, leaving us stuck in the train.

"FUCK YOU, Mister! Say 'excuse me' NICELY, why don't you?" the girl replied, smirking, her friend laughing along with her.

I heard only a muffled gasp as my hand clenched round her throat, and the other passengers moved away as I shoved her body into a remote corner of the train.

"Now you listen to me, Missy. Don't you dare talk to me, or any other adult, like that again. It's about time someone taught you some manners." My left hand remained firmly clenched around her neck as my right rained blows across her smug face, alternating palm with the back of my hand.

After my fury was spent, I let go and watched her slide to the floor and huddle, terrified, in the corner of the train, her body convulsing in sobs. I exited the car to the thundering applause of my fellow passengers.


*****************************************

"FUCK YOU, Mister! Say 'excuse me' NICELY, why don't you?" the girl replied, smirking.

As I exited the train, I turned and said "someone needs to teach you some manners, Miss."

"Yeah? Well FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" she cackled. I turned and stared into her face until the doors slammed closed and the train whisked her away. I heard her voice, faintly, until the train was well out of the station.




You pick.

20 comments:

Dale said...

Holy hell I hate that stuff. I'm glad you pummelled her. But are pretending you didn't.

lulu said...

Welcome a my average day. Only I get to give detentions.

Echo said...

I do not condone of violence. Obliteration on the other hand....

Coaster Punchman said...

Sorry if that sounded a little dark, but I really wanted to injure that pile of cat sick. After the train pulled away I debated the pros and cons of going to jail for murdering someone like that.

I don't know what it is with people standing in the doors of the subway lately, but I really am ready to strangle someone. The next person to get in my way may have something scary to deal with.

Beth said...

Either scenario, you're my hero.

Echo said...

I used to experience that in DC all the time. People wouldn't step out to let others off. Acting like assholes. And don't get me started on the subway conductors closing the doors on people trying to get on or off...

CP, next time just start cackling like a deranged maniac....watch the crowd part...

gizmorox said...

I think your beating the life out of her would have elicited cheers. I'm willing to bet her brilliant attitude won't take her far in life, though, and that's possibly karma enough. Possibly.

Jacob's Mom said...

Meeting new friends is always hard!! Did you invite her for Turkey day??? hahahahaha Of ocursse I can say this from a small town view,wiat until I visit. And we are looking forwward to the visit. :)

Anonymous said...

wow I would have wanted to strangle her but the opted to ignore her as killing her wasn't going to be worth going to jail for,

Coffeypot said...

The first scenario was the best, and I was applauding you. Sorry it was just a dream. Oh, Yeah! Just to make sure she understood completely, I would have give her a good kick before turning to leave.

wonderturtle said...

Oh man, I hate poor subway etiquette!! Even more than poor gym etiquette! When I used to go to the gym!

Anonymous said...

Ah New York! Where's Spiderman when you need him? I'm having a hard time deciding-bitch she-devil humiliation or being a gentleman. Hmmmm! Someone like that always gets what they deserve, I opt for Karma.

Anonymous said...

I think I like the scenario where you DON'T bitchslap a young stranger. Even though she kinda deserves it.

jin said...

Next time give her a piercing stare & whisper barely loud enough to hear....."i know where you live....."

Creepy said...

Lulu: I'm waiting for you to give me detention.

CP: Everyone needs someone to handle their dirty work. That's where contractors come in to play...

Martin said...

I like the scenario where you rip her head off and shit down her throat.

You also need to help people by looking the in the eye, absolutely disgusted yet mystified, as if they had just picked their nose with a plyers, and say, "Do you realize you're standing in the doorway?"

In NYC, 1/2 will be offended the other 1/2 will say, "Oh, I hate it when people do that. Sorry." Then move. Those are good odds.

Molecular Turtle said...

Second senario for sure. When I used to take the subway here in Toronto the blocking of doors and rushing into the subway before others had a chance to exit was a huge annoyance. The TTC has now realized this and posed a billion stickers to make us aware this is rude. Time will tell if it works (doubtful)

Melinda June said...

She doesn't happen to usher at night, does she?

Tumuli said...

I preferred the first scenario, though that likely would have caused a brawl and possible imprisonment. But some days, it's worth it. ;)

Coaster Punchman said...

Hi all, thanks for your comments. Just to let you know, scenario 2 is how it really happened, although at the time I did consider just abouit all of the violent suggestions you mention. I can be a mean fucker, but I never get physically violent. I keep meaning to change that.