Wednesday, March 23, 2011

An open letter to 網站設計

Dear 網站設計,

You keep visiting my Blogger friends, telling them how much you miss their writings on theater and writing. But you never visit me. Aren't MY writings on theater and writing ALSO "much missed?" It hurts me to be left out like this.

I too sometimes write about "theater," but I have to admit I don't have too many writings about "writing." I know some people have published books on writing, and I often talk about how Blogger is for writers whereas Facebook and Twitter are for hacks. But I don't think that's what you were getting at when you visited my friend Dale recently. Dale's post was about ventriloquists, which surely should not count as theater. Am I right?

And I'm fairly certain Dale didn't address writing in his post. So why did you have to visit him and not me?

Your friends 情趣, 巴黎, and even 充氣娃娃 used to visit me. Frequently. So frequently that I had to call in 角色扮演 to kick their asses. At one point I threatened legal action, and ultimately activated that annoying "comments moderation" feature so that I could force them to stop visiting. That was especially aggravating for me, given that I am perilously lazy and always seek to do as little work as possible.

But now that 情趣, 巴黎, and 充氣娃娃 don't visit any more I have become lonely. Please don't be so cruel to me, 網站設計. Stop breaking my heart. Won't you please visit me too? I promise I'll try to write more about theater. And writing.

Love and coasters,



BeckEye said...


Mnmom said...

They ALL used to visit me, and want me to click through. But I was scared, so very scared.

Megan said...

You remind me that I have not seen any of them in a while, either. I wonder what they're up to, these days?

michaelg said...

I put the characters through an on-line translator hoping for pornographic language, but got some boring proverbish stuff instead. If you're going to spam, make it tasty.

Dale said...

Spam. I eat that shit up.

Esther said...

I used to get them, too. That's why I turned on comment moderation (back when I was still blogging regularly). I could tell from my statcounter that they were coming from an ISP on Taiwan. You'd think Blogger could just block that ISP. Very frustrating.

Doc said...

Hey CP,

I'm hosting Flash Fiction Friday this week and I was hoping you could write a little something. This week's prompt seemed to be right up your alley. Swing by if you get the chance.


GrizzBabe said...

I hate spam! I delete it whenever I can.

The canned meat product, served fried with scrambled eggs, is surprisingly tasty.