Sunday, October 08, 2006

Who can turn the world on with his smile?


The Gentle Readers who already know CP in person may remember the awesome powers bestowed upon him by Mary Tyler Moore.

The relationship between MTM and CP began in 1997 when CP's friend Suzanne had a nervous breakdown and got locked in a mental ward for a few days. After her release, things were touch and go for several weeks while Suzanne recuperated at home and regained her sense of the world. CP kept wondering what he could do to help Suzanne feel better.

Late one night, Mary Tyler Moore came to CP in a vision. Mary said to CP "you need to call Suzanne and play her my theme song on your piano." Then Mary went away, never again to be seen by CP except for in late night reruns.*

The next morning, CP called Suzanne and left his version of the MTM theme song on her answering machine. Suzanne called back later to tell CP how much the message meant to her. Thus began the Coaster Punchman tradition of MTM'ing people during their times of need.

The powers bestowed upon CP have lain dormant for a number of years now, but have recently been revived and are again ready for use.

If someone you know needs to be Mary-Tyler-Moore'd, send CP the party's name and phone number at cp.marytylermoore@yahoo.com.

CP adheres to a strict privacy policy regarding all phone numbers sent to him. Phone numbers are deleted promptly after a successful MTM'ing, and CP never shares these numbers with anyone. Not even Poor George.

So MTM your friends and loved ones today - if they need it, that is!



*The Gentle Readers of this blog may be interested to know that Poor George once appeared in a low-budget independent film with Mary Tyler Moore, entitled The Story of Sissy, which starred drag legend Jackie Curtis. The film never enjoyed a wide theatrical release, and the whereabouts of the masters are unknown due to the death of the film's producer in the early 1990s. Unfortunately, Mary's involvement in the film project was not voluntary. The producers were simply filming on a New York street one day when they saw Mary Tyler Moore approach. They quickly shifted their camera angles so that they could capture Mary's image as part of the setting. Mary probably never even knew she was in the film.

26 comments:

Old Lady said...

I didn't know you could play piano!

Tumuli said...

I didn't know you possessed such awesome gifts (piano playing + invoking MTM at will). I might need to summon you for someone...

Bella Rossa said...

This is terribly apropos, CP. Since I moved to Chicago a little more than a year ago, I've been serenaded with the MTM theme song every time I've hit a speed bump.

Every time I've had another letdown on a job possibility, or a similarly discouraging event, someone who loves me gets on the phone (or picks me up in their car) and sings this to me.

It's seriously an inspiration and/or tear-prompter for me, depending on the mood I'm in when it's sung to me.

And you, too, know and harness its power. Aww...

Coaster Punchman said...

Yes, Old Lady, and I have other talents too. Such as summoning Mary Tyler Moore to come to me in visions. (Does it still count if I had been on drugs?)

Tumuli, thanks for playing the tag game against your better judgment. You should share with us some of your most awesome gifts.

Bella, the only thing I can say is that if your people are also involved in my MTM phenomenon, I am greatly humbled & honored to be a part of it. I hope someone will request my MTM services on your behalf at your next speed bump.

Old Lady said...

Does it make me a special person to say that I have touched the MTM statue in Minneapolis?

Coaster Punchman said...

Yes, Old Lady, except that you'd be special anyway.

CP

Bubs said...

CP that is fascinating! You have to promise to use your gift for good, and not evil.

For what it's worth, my youngest brother either cries or nearly cries every time he hears that song. He has no idea why.

Coaster Punchman said...

You have my word. And it sounds like your brother may also benefit from my services. Or analysis.

jin said...

Ok...I seem to be the only one here who doesn't know what the MTM theme song sounds like. *blush*

Um...I've heard of her, but never saw the show.

You still like me, right?
...right?
CP?
Hellloooo!

Coaster Punchman said...

Jin, love is all around - no need to waste it!

CP

PinkFluffySlippers said...

Wow, CP. That's a lovely offer. You're making the world a better place.

Beth said...

I wanna be MTM'ed! Can I put in my own request when I really need it?

Molecular Turtle said...

That's so fun. I'll definitely bookmark this post CP. You're making the world a better place one phone call at a time.

Melinda June said...

Having been the recipient of many an MTM, I must admit this is definitely a mystical cure all.

Coaster Punchman said...

Pink Fluffy Slippers, you are making my blog a better place with that picture! I love it!

Beth, of course you can send an MTM to yourself. It's kind of like sending yourself flowers, but we hold such things confidential over here at CPW. Plus, we encourage all kinds of self gratification.

Don't you have about 8 email addresses anyway? How would I even know it's you?

Molecular Turtle, thanks. We try.

MJ, I was thinking you were about due for another one anyway.

CP

Old Lady said...

A while back you comment on Company Bitch - guess what, she has disable commenting altogether on her blog! Strange!

Old Lady said...

I have become tenseless-I might have to leave GEWS for GESUS!

Coaster Punchman said...

Old Lady, that's ok, you can join my breakaway group "Lu's For Cheeses."

CP

Grant Miller said...

The "A-Team" theme song always cheers me up. Can you play it?

Mother of Invention said...

What a cool idea! All the more so because it seems to be magical. I loved that show! The cast was amazingly strong, every one of them. Loved Dick Van Dyke too! The theme songs were great for all those shows.

Dale said...

You're so damned brilliant CP, a friend to the world! Great idea.

Anonymous said...

I will certainly make a note of this new service you offer. Mostly my friends need dates though and not cheerful songs. . .

Coaster Punchman said...

Grant, I'm not sure, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.

I agree Mother, Mary rocks. Too bad she's not real.

Thanks Dale. Brilliant is as brillian does, sir.

Megan, if you MTM your friends they might start to get dates.

Tenacious S said...

I've been MTM'ed and it was fabulous! Made my day! I saved it so I can be happy and encouraged everyday.

Bella Rossa said...

Are your ears burning? I blogged about you. Hope this doesn't kick off an avalanche of requests: http://bellarossa.typepad.com/my_weblog/2006/10/do_you_need_to_.html

Coaster Punchman said...

Ten-S., always glad to be of service.

Bella, I am nothing less than humbled to be featured on your excellent website.

CP