Saturday, September 09, 2006

New Girlfriend


It's official. CP is in love with Reese Witherspoon.

I first began to admire her in the Legally Blonde movies. Then, I developed a full-on crush after her performance in Walk the Line.

But last night I went to Blockbuster while George was making a delicious dinner of Japanese curry and rice. He requested V for Vendetta, which I got for him. I also noticed a Reese movie I hadn't seen, Just Like Heaven, which I decided to rent.

Ok, so now the crush is over. I am full-fledgedly in love with this woman. Love her, love her, love her.

And the movie made me cry. What a friggin Mary. But nonetheless, if Reese came a-knockin', I'd have to ask George for some time off. He'd understand, because he cried too.

Let the cyberstalking commence.

26 comments:

Katy said...

I love her too. She was so good in Just like heaven I cried like a baby. I love the legally blond movie and the one where she is a designer that moves from down south to NYC and has to go back to get her divorce (forgot the name) and I liked her in Cruel Intension. Honestly I have not seen a bad movie with her yet!

Jacob's Mom said...

Sweet Home Alabama is my favorite. She's so down to earth.

Megan said...

She's pretty cool. When I taught Government I used to show my kids Legally Blonde 2 at the end of the year. They all whined and complained about what a ditz she was, but they were sold by the end of the movie. She's adorable.

Oh, and thanks for the link!

Creepy said...

She is adorable. My own crush on her dates back many moons.

Echo said...

So, who makes the Alterna List, CP? Remember, we can't just go around adding people willy-nilly to the list... What will that say to the kids?

Coaster Punchman said...

Hmmmm... well I guess I don't have a problem with gender as much as politics. So I'd have to pick from a pool of Republicans that would normally make me want to hurl, but to whom I'd give a charity, uh, date. But then again, the great thing about being a guy is that even if the person in question is completely reprehensible in all social ways, you'd still be willing to, um, date them as long as they looked good.

So for me I guess you'd have to ask "which ugly people would you put on the list?" And that, I'm not sure I could answer right away. Maybe someone whose music or writing or artistry I completely admired but otherwise wouldn't want them near me. Maybe Lyle Lovett? Julia was able to tolerate him, after all. Michael Stipe? Julia Child? I guess I'll have to think about it.

Coaster Punchman said...

I'll add both the Sedarises to the Alterna-List. Neither of them is really my cup of tea physically, but I'd marry them both if a) I were single and b) they would have me, which they would not because I'm not famous enough.

Echo said...

The Alterna-list is tricky business. Before the Alterna-list, my list was a thousand people long... Now it's only 999...

Poor George said...

Honey, if Reese Witherspoon knocked on our door to take you off my hands, I would be like, are you with the ASPCA or something? How much in residuals will I receive monthly for the CP? Where do I sign?

Old Lady said...

She has made many movies, so you got some catchin up to do!!!!!

Dale said...

Kevin Smith thinks she's adorable too CP.

I think she's pretty likable myself.

Coaster Punchman said...

Hmmm.... well this Kevin Smith sounds a little bit like an asshole. I mean, who does he think he is? Sure, he made a few OK movies but he made some dogs too. Clerks? Mallrats? Can we all say "Fucking Stupid" together?

Plus, if she really did sneer at Joey, I'm sure Joey's comments must have sounded sarcastic. There is surely more to this story, because Reese is perfect, and pretty too.

Like Old Lady, I am fiercely loyal.

The wrath of the CP is about to be unleashed! Need we remind Kevin Smith of the danger he puts himself in by crossing me?

lulu said...

I don't know, CP, if Kevin Smith is anti-Reese, I think she might be bad news.

I think she is lovely and a talented actress, but Kevin Smith is Godlike.

jin said...

You have not seen Reese until you've seen her in "FREEWAY".

One of my FAVES!

Dale said...

No more matches Coaster please!! I hope my disclaimer of actually liking her is enough to keep me safe. I'm very glad I didn't mention the whole Reese camp freak out over having been lent the same dress for an awards show someone else had worn a few years earlier. She made heads roll.

Can't Kevin and Reese just rule different sections of the universe?

Coaster Punchman said...

Dale, I am also fiercely loyal to your factions, so you are safe from my wrath. In fact, my services are available to you if you ever need them. I think I may have heard about this dress business, although I have lived among Hollywood assistants and they all know something like that is indeed a fireable offence (unlike not getting their boss the correct coffee drink, or by mispronouncing words like Venti, infranctions for which people do get (unfairly) fired regularly in Hollywood.)

Coaster Punchman said...

Lu, Godlike? Methinks no. In fact, I think he's related to Susan Smith, the one who drove her kids into that lake. As Judy Tenuta suggested, the two of them should be strapped to the top of a VW and Ted Kennedy should drive them to the lake to see how they like it.

Katy, Marg, Megan Old Lady & Jin, thank you for remaining on the side of righteousness. I will indeed have an entire Reese filmfest one of these days. Maybe I'll set up a shrine to her like Michael Jackson did for Liz Taylor.

I think I'm going to have to take down this Kevin Smith. Stay tuned.

Dale said...

*Ven-tee* *Ven-tay*

Why are these words echoing in my head?

I do love the fact that we're all at least now honouring false gods.

Nikki P. said...

CP why stop with cyber stalking? I hear she's here in Toronto for the filmfest. If I catch a glimpse I'll send her your regards:)

chil6178 said...

I saw Johnny D last year as well as Bruce Willis from afar. That not be a bad idea.

Beth said...

And don't you lust after that San Francisco apartment? I've spent many an hour fantasizing about my inhabitation of that place ...

Coaster Punchman said...

*Ventee* *Ventay* - those are ancient prayers in the holy house of Starbucks, Dale. Must be repressed false memories from the Starbuckonic Ritual Abuse you likely suffered as a young child.

Niki & Chil, thanks for the suggestion, but I'm afraid of startling people with my goiter if I go out in public. That's why I prefer cyberstalking.

Beth, perhaps you can plan on working as a ghost for a while in the afterlife. That way you can have any apartment you want. And talk about cyberstalking....

Tumuli said...

She's definitely beautiful. I never was a fan, but the charm has wormed its way through me.

Dale said...

She's a producer now too CP, she was yakking about it on ET Canada tonight. She's red carpeting all over Toronto the last few days. I was in the next room so missed most of it but I think I heard her say something about a stalker.

blog Portland said...

Just make sure she doesn't stab you with that chin.

Grant Miller said...

I'm sorry. She is my girlfriend. Everyone knows this.