Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Public Service Announcment: Do not cross the CP

I was checking out Some Guy's Blog and saw that he posted about some of his childhood bullies. This reminded me that I owe you all this Public Service Announcement.

When I was in seventh grade, a kid named Robbie was my bully. He did just about everything he could do to me. He even would have stolen my lunch money if I had been the kind of kid to bring lunch money to school.

One day he made me so mad that I went home, took a book of matches and an ashtry, sat cross-legged on the floor of the family room and burned each of the matches, one after the other, all the while chanting "I light this match to the Death of Robbie."

Robbie is now dead. I found out on our high school class reunion website.


Yessssssssssssss!

28 comments:

Dale said...

I fear and admire you Coaster Punchman. Got a light?

Echo said...

Uh...ummm.... Echo loves everyone...ummm...Grant Miller's a dick?

Tenacious S said...

I'm going to drive around and collect books of matches today and send them to you. You seem to have the powers and I have a mission for you....

Echo said...

Note to self: Do NOT cross Tenacious-S...

jin said...

Hahahahahahaha!!!!!!

Nothing I adore more than a vicious EVIL streak!!!

Yay! :-D

Old Lady said...

Took a long time for that root to take!

Tenacious S said...

Echo, you have nothing to fear, for now. I have someone else in mind. Striking matches, watching them burn, chanting names......

Echo said...

For now??? For now?????? Yeeks... Sounds serious, T.

Tenacious S said...

Ok, ok, if you're gonna freak out about it, you're not on that list. Just behave and everything will be fine.

Anonymous said...

ummm......am *I* on the list, Shar?

Tenacious S said...

Oh for god's sake. Do we not know when we are playing around? What kind of creep do you all think I am? I'm a behavior analyst. I'm the person who toys with behavior for work and play.

Tenacious S said...

PS-The only person who is allowed to call me Shar is Lulu. So unless Lulu is posting as anonymous, you get to call me by my blog name. I know CP's real name and do not use it here. This is playtime, kids.

Jacob's Mom said...

Okay but how did he die?

lulu said...

um, Shar? That was me. I wasn't on my own computer and didn't realize that I wasn't signed in, so yes, in this one instance I was posting as anonymous.

So am *I* on the list? ;-)

Tenacious S said...

I was hoping it was you Lulu. Only you get to call me that. Everyone else has to "play." of course you're not on the list. Who will take care of my children if I am on someone's list? Oh well, back to collecting matches for CP.

Coaster Punchman said...

I've been calling you "Shar" a lot in the comments. I hope that didn't put me on the list! But wait! I can't be on the list, because I'm the medium!

I'm not sure exactly how he died, but I heard it wasn't pretty.

Echo said...

CP... you still up for assisting The Unofficial along with .... ?

Tenacious S said...

CP, you too have the "Shar" privileges along with MJ.

Echo said...

You all may call me....echo.

Thank you,

the management.

Coaster Punchman said...

Echo, I would be pleased to trash -- er, I mean babysit your site. I'm sure my trusted colleagues Lulu, Ten-S and Melinda June would be glad to assist as well. In fact three of the four of us will be together this very weekend as Ms. Melinda June enters her fifth decade; perhaps we could throw a kegger over at the Unofficial during your absence.

Tenacious S said...

What else would I call you? I've heard you called a few other things, but I think I'll stick to Echo. I'm being a little weird about the name thing, I know, but not many people at all call me Shar and I kind of like Tenacious S, Ten S, TS, or my favorite-just plain T!

Tenacious S said...

CP, you mean the three of you. I am stuck here in Chicago with no one to play with. I wish like heck I could be there.

Tenacious S said...

OK, I'm a dork and misread. Yes, the three of you will be there, implying that I will be here. I think I need to go the The Detholz to make myself feel better. The hubby is dragging his feet though. He doesn't like loud music near as much as I do.

Coaster Punchman said...

Plain "T" is also code for transgender. Which we haven't ruled out regarding Echo yet.

Echo said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Beth said...

May I send you a list of bully names?

Coaster Punchman said...

Funny, I've been getting a number of such requests! I'll have to think about it. I'm kind of like Samantha Stevens that way. George has requested I not misuse my awesome powers, but I still do on occasion. Unfortunately, they haven't worked on our President...yet....

Anonymous said...

You're using the wrong matches!!!