Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Annoying Things My Sales Reps Do and Say to Me: Dean part 2


Dean: Tom, you don't need to include the Account Manager in emails where we are discussing what to sell to the account. You shouldn't have invited Lana to that meeting where we are going to try to sell Product X.


Tom: But the idea to sell Product X to that customer was Lana's. She is the one who brought it up to the customer and suggested a live demo. She is the one who emailed both of us about the idea and asked if I wanted to set up the appointment. Of course she should have been included.


Dean: Well it's ok that you did it this time, but in the future, if you have any questions about that, I would appreciate if you would ask me before including her.


Ed. note: Keep in mind that a) Dean is not my boss; b) Lana, as the Account Manager, has sales responsibilities as well. So what Dean is saying here is that next time an Account Manager contacts me about a lead he or she generated, I am to cut him or her out immediately and deal only with Dean.



Dean, you are a supreme asshole. I hope you are captured by the Taliban and burned at the stake as an infidel.


The nerve. I mean, really.

26 comments:

Marni said...

Dean needs an old-fashioned pummeling (I was going to say ass whooping, but you beat me to it by putting it as a label).

He sounds like a complete dick-wad.

(My word verification is xfftfc! A fft fck! Just like DEAN! Am I the only one that finds that funny?)

Marni said...

Blogger used the exclamation point instead of the K! I'm bummed...

Dino aka Katy said...

i hate people like that - i just had it happen with the AP business a minute ago. some greedy B..ch took the lead away from the person that should have had it - it sucks

Coaster Punchman said...

No kidding Marni. Would you like to do the honors? I've really about had it with him.

Coaster Punchman said...

Sorry to hear you have to deal with these types too, Katy. With Dean I don't even care so much what he tries to steal; he's just so damn bossy. Hate that.

Melinda June said...

Dean is a mutha. Fuck him.

lulu said...

Maybe you should blind cc her, that way Dean won't know that she is getting all the info and he'll be confused when she shows up.

Have you tried looking at him and saying "You're not the boss of me?"

Coaster Punchman said...

Ewww, Min. Oh, you didn't mean for real.

No Lu, but I did tell him one time that he might want to consider keeping his unsolicited criticism to himself. (That's why I became "touchy.")

lulu said...

perhaps you need to develop a slightly crazy persona, so that he's not sure if you're going to snap at any moment. I do this with my students, and it is pretty effective. (or possibly I really am about to snap at any moment, sometimes the lines are blurred)

Tanya Espanya said...

Gee, Tom, you're so sensitive, you need to lighten up a bit.

(did my sarcasm come through? There should be an icon for that...)

HAHAHAHAHA!! I hate Dean! He is a moron AND an imbecile!

I agree with Lulu's suggestion...can you start sprinkling some dandruff on your shoulder and maybe drool once in a while?

Coaster Punchman said...

Um Lu, isn't that what people already think of me? I mean, when you saw me with those knitting needles didn't just a tiny part of you wonder if I might stick one in somebody's eye?

Dandruff & drool Tanya, you're one classy dame! I like it!

Jake's Mom said...

When he says "I know what you're thinking." you can say, "Yeah, then why aren't you protecting yourself?!"
The nerve (said in th fashion of the 3 stooges)

Beth said...

Let us hurt Dean. Pleeeeeeeease?

Dale said...

Tell him to think inside the box as you drive the last nail into it and mail him directly to cave country.

Megan said...

I don't like this Dean.

chelene said...

Sounds like Dean needs a little less conversation and a little more action. Chip in for a hooker.

Coaster Punchman said...

Gladly, Marg. Sit and spin is what you're supposed to say when you give someone the finger. Apparently they are supposed to insert your finger in a certain orifice and spin on it. I'm sure it requires a lot of upper body strength.

Oh Beth, do NOT tease me. But I'm so glad you are inspired to feel this way. I really would like to injure him somehow.

Dale, that was funny. I actually laughed real laughter.

Thank you Megan. I am feeling better just knowing how much everyone else hates him too.

He could need a hooker Chelene, but what he needs most is to be far away from me. For always.

Old Lady said...

I have worked in Sales for 20 years. I can tell you stories! Particularly if one is a lowly admin or some sort.

Coaster Punchman said...

I can only imagine, Old Lady. I'm not even a lowly admin, yet I am still treated as such.

Johnny Yen said...

Don't hold back, CP-- what do you really think....

Coaster Punchman said...

What do I think, Johnny? That Dean needs to go away.

Writeprocrastinator said...

"Dean, you are a supreme asshole."

Coast, dig it, this is what you do.

I'm sure that you have one of his business cards, right? Get some more printed up with the added title of "Supreme Asshole" at the very bottom and have somebody at his office make the switch with his regular business cards.

I'm sure it won't be too hard to find an accomplice at his place of employment. Why, I'll bet they'll be fighting each other for the privledge.

Coaster Punchman said...

Good one, Write. Of course then I'll have to delete all my posts about him, lest someone find out. Except that his real name is not Dean, so I should be ok.

Jake's Mom said...

I gotta stop watching HBO unsupervised.

"jew" "girl" said...

that dean is menses hopped up on a bad yeast infection! you tell that bitch to back the fuck off!

Coaster Punchman said...

Jm: Well if you're so innocent, why do you keep feeling yourself up through your skirt in your profile pic?

Katie, yeast infection! If Dean had a desk in my office I'd leave him little piles of cottage cheese as a gag. You're right though, he is a little bitch. Mindy thinks I should start calling him "Butt Boy" right to his face.